Me, Me, Me

This morning I was feeling tired and cranky, the byproduct of staying up past my bedtime last night and feeling the full effects of an allergy pill that is supposed to be non-drowsy but was making me feel like I was in a fog today. By the time the worship service and Sunday school were over, I just wanted to get out of there and go home and take a nap. I found myself being less than my usual friendly self with people who were talking to me because I was focused on how tired I was.

On the drive home, I realized that my tiredness probably came across more like rudeness to the people I encountered. I saw that I was so wrapped up in how I was feeling and what I wanted to do that I basically ignored other people's needs.

I wish I could say that that was a rare occurrence, but sadly, it's not. I don't mean that I act tired and cranky all the time, but I do tend to focus many times on myself and ignore those around me.

When I'm focused on myself, I can become critical of other people, of the worship service, of my co-workers, you name it. When I'm focused on myself, I become easily discouraged if my perceived needs aren't being met on my timetable. When I'm focused on myself, nothing satisfies me--not material things, not relationships or friendships, not success at work.

By contrast, I am a much more joyful and contented person when I am looking to meet the needs of others rather than getting my own needs met. I suppose that's why selfishness is one of Satan's most oft-used and effective tools. He knows that if he can get our focus off of God and others and onto ourselves, our attitudes and actions will be anything but Christlike.

If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. (Philippians 2:1-4)

How thankful I am for those who see me when I'm cranky, self-centered or just downright rude, and still love me and forgive me anyway. And how extremely thankful I am for God's mercy and grace in forgiving and loving me!

O God, You know that I need so much help in keeping my focus on You and on those who You have put into my life. Teach me to trust You completely and to put others' needs ahead of my own. Let Your Spirit work in me to make me a humble servant, willing and ready to serve You--even when I'm feeling tired. Even when it's been a long week and everyone seems to want something from me. Even when I feel like I can't do it--remind me that with You, ALL things are possible! In Jesus' name, Amen.