Wednesday, August 01, 2007

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back...or So It Seems

Sometimes I feel like I've made a lot of progress in my walk with God. Then I have days (or in some cases, weeks) where I find myself dealing with old negative attitudes and hurts that I thought I'd put to rest long ago. Recovering from a broken heart is a series of emotional ups and downs; some days I feel like I've come a long way, and the next day I find myself breaking down for the millionth time. Frustrated is an apt description of how I'm feeling.

Yesterday I read this article about how God often works behind the scenes, in ways that we can't see until the time is right. Of course, I want to be able to see all that He's doing right NOW. But God, in His infinite and unexplainable wisdom, keeps some things hidden. I don't like that. But He must have a reason and I trust that one day, either here on Earth or in Heaven, He'll reveal what He's been up to.

I am truly grateful for the many times over the past year when I've seen and felt evidence of God working on my heart. He has brought about many changes in me for which I'm thankful. And in those times when I feel like I'm regressing rather than progressing, times when I can't see any evidence of change, I will try to remember that some of God's best work is done behind the scenes. I want my faith in what He's doing in me to increase more and more.

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